I believe Perfect Hostess is the name of a song by the Korgis, and it's one of my aims in life. I have thrown some very dismal parties, but I have a knack for throwing together good jam sessions. It's easy: get together some musicians, throw in food. Alcohol not needed.
I strive to serve something nice to each guest, whether it's their favorite diet root beer, or a choice of iced green or black tea. At a jam session at my house the other night, which followed close on the heels of an 11-hour work day, I had soup, grilled pastrami and cheese sandwiches (because I was starving) and brownies for anyone who didn't want soup and sandwiches. I also had hot green tea with honey and I periodically floated out of the session whenever my vocals weren't needed and heated up more hot water, filled tea cups, passed out napkins, and all that. You know, hostessy stuff. One musician left around nine, the other around ten.
The next day the guy who left first asked me with a smirk if my brownies had "done the trick." I was sort of puzzled--done WHAT trick? He then asked if the other guy had "thanked me for the brownies by staying over," i.e., dick for brownies. This is incredibly offensive to me---I bake to release stress, I set a nice table because I have that sort of background, and I feed people out of good manners. I had grandmothers and a mother who would have died of shame if someone left the house without having had at least a cup of tea and a nosh. Poor people always feed you anyway. I packaged up all the brownies and sent them home with the second guy as he's super busy, not feeling well, and also, I don't like to have brownies around the house where I will eat them. I've had a bit of a relapse, not quite out of remission but not feeling well, and I've been on huge amounts of medication which makes me retain a lot of water and cough like a chain-smoking house madame. My joints hurt, my elbows are so swollen I can't wear my button down shirts, and I can't keep to my usual exercise regime although I do move a lot. The last thing I need is to sit and eat my feelings with a pan of brownies. (Although reading through this tempts me to do exactly that.)
Anyone who thinks brownies are all I have to offer as bait doesn't know squat about me. However, the brownie recipe I've come up with is divine, and is the icing on the cake of anyone who really DOES get my overall vibe.
You can microwave these--six minutes, full power (I have a 700 watt oven) in a square 8 by 8 cake pan does the trick nicely.
First, melt a half cup of butter and let it cool for at least five minutes.
While that's going on,
beat the crap out of three small eggs (two large ones)
Add one cup of sugar, and a big teaspoon of homemade vanilla (brandy works just fine)
Beat until quite thick and fluffy and smooth.
Dump in 3/4 cup flour, 6 tablespoons of cocoa powder, and the half cup of butter. Yes, it can be self-raising flour, but plain baking flour is best.
Stir just long enough to combine the ingredients.
Pour into a square cake pan, and bake as directed above.
You can stir in other things, such as toasted nuts, crushed peppermint sticks, etc. A light sprinkle of mini-chocolate chips does it for me.
These are simple, but simply delicious. Just like me. (Especially the simple part.)
I strive to serve something nice to each guest, whether it's their favorite diet root beer, or a choice of iced green or black tea. At a jam session at my house the other night, which followed close on the heels of an 11-hour work day, I had soup, grilled pastrami and cheese sandwiches (because I was starving) and brownies for anyone who didn't want soup and sandwiches. I also had hot green tea with honey and I periodically floated out of the session whenever my vocals weren't needed and heated up more hot water, filled tea cups, passed out napkins, and all that. You know, hostessy stuff. One musician left around nine, the other around ten.
The next day the guy who left first asked me with a smirk if my brownies had "done the trick." I was sort of puzzled--done WHAT trick? He then asked if the other guy had "thanked me for the brownies by staying over," i.e., dick for brownies. This is incredibly offensive to me---I bake to release stress, I set a nice table because I have that sort of background, and I feed people out of good manners. I had grandmothers and a mother who would have died of shame if someone left the house without having had at least a cup of tea and a nosh. Poor people always feed you anyway. I packaged up all the brownies and sent them home with the second guy as he's super busy, not feeling well, and also, I don't like to have brownies around the house where I will eat them. I've had a bit of a relapse, not quite out of remission but not feeling well, and I've been on huge amounts of medication which makes me retain a lot of water and cough like a chain-smoking house madame. My joints hurt, my elbows are so swollen I can't wear my button down shirts, and I can't keep to my usual exercise regime although I do move a lot. The last thing I need is to sit and eat my feelings with a pan of brownies. (Although reading through this tempts me to do exactly that.)
Anyone who thinks brownies are all I have to offer as bait doesn't know squat about me. However, the brownie recipe I've come up with is divine, and is the icing on the cake of anyone who really DOES get my overall vibe.
You can microwave these--six minutes, full power (I have a 700 watt oven) in a square 8 by 8 cake pan does the trick nicely.
First, melt a half cup of butter and let it cool for at least five minutes.
While that's going on,
beat the crap out of three small eggs (two large ones)
Add one cup of sugar, and a big teaspoon of homemade vanilla (brandy works just fine)
Beat until quite thick and fluffy and smooth.
Dump in 3/4 cup flour, 6 tablespoons of cocoa powder, and the half cup of butter. Yes, it can be self-raising flour, but plain baking flour is best.
Stir just long enough to combine the ingredients.
Pour into a square cake pan, and bake as directed above.
You can stir in other things, such as toasted nuts, crushed peppermint sticks, etc. A light sprinkle of mini-chocolate chips does it for me.
These are simple, but simply delicious. Just like me. (Especially the simple part.)
No comments:
Post a Comment